Work and Faith

I don't know if you have heard of this thing called the ECONOMY, but it isn't very good right now. Especially for these guys ---------------------->

TONS of Construction workers of all kinds are out of work right now, and have been out of work for a long time. My AWESOME HUSBAND just so happens to be an Electrician, and falls into the construction category. We had been fortunate that Brian had always been able to find work. Even after 2 Companies he worked for turned belly up, and another company laid him off. He was never one day without a job. That is until April 2010 when we found out I was PREGNANT and we had BOUGHT OUR HOUSE!! Just weeks after all of these life changing events were taking place, we found out that Brian was losing his job yet again! (Not to mention our Maternity Insurance!!)

I didn't really worry about it too much. Yes, it was terrible timing, and losing our GOOD maternity insurance sucked. (I have insurance through my job but the maternity deductible is $7,500 rather than Brian's old insurance where it was only $1,000) But Brian had never had a problem finding a job, in fact they often found him! Well, no jobs came looking for Brian, and in spite of Brian and I looking EVERYWHERE, and I mean EVERYWHERE for a electrical job, None where to be found. Well we were denied for unemployment and Brian appealed the decision but you know how the government works, you jump through all of the hoops and it takes FOREVER to get anything done.

DAYS went by with no job then

WEEKS with no job turned into

MONTHS with no job

Ok I was STRESSED...Really Stressed! I was working full time and PUKING MY GUTS OUT! (Thanks a lot "Morning" Sickness!) We exhausted our savings and we were on the brink of financial devastation. After several trips to the temple, fasting, and praying, nothing seemed to help and I was quite discouraged. I had the realization that we were not going to be able to pay our bills for this week, or our medical bills for the baby, and I was very upset. I had a breakdown and was talking to my mom about everything, and she told me that I needed to quit crying and JUST HAVE FAITH. I immediately responded with yelling, "WELL FAITH DOESN'T PAY THE BILLS or PUT FOOD ON THE TABLE!!!!" After I had calmed down a little, I remembered what I had said, and I was shocked. I have never in my life been so stressed out/upset/terrified that I reacted with anger toward my Heavenly Father. Which only made me more depressed.

Last Sunday we were sitting in ward conference and we sang one of my favorite hymns:

COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS

1.
When upon life's billows you are tempest tossed,
When you are discouraged, thinking all is lost,
Count your many blessings, name them one by one,
And it will surprise you what the Lord hath done.

Refrain
Count your blessings, name them one by one,
Count your blessings, see what God hath done!
Count your blessings, name them one by one,
And it will surprise you what the Lord hath done.

2.
Are you ever burdened with a load of care?
Does the cross seem heavy you are called to bear?
Count your many blessings, every doubt will fly,
And you will keep singing as the days go by.

Refrain

3.
When you look at others with their lands and gold,
Think that Christ has promised you His wealth untold;
Count your many blessings. Wealth can never buy
Your reward in heaven, nor your home on high.

Refrain

4.
So, amid the conflict whether great or small,
Do not be disheartened, God is over all;
Count your many blessings, angels will attend,
Help and comfort give you to your journey's end.

As I sat sobbing in my pew, with Brian trying to comfort me. I got exactly what I needed. Did Brian get a job as we sat in church? No, he didn't, did a rich stranger offer us an envelope full of money?? No, what I needed was to get my priorities in order, and quit thinking of everything that was going wrong and be grateful for all the Lord has blessed us with. Just a few things I am grateful for:

• The ability to have children


• A roof over our head


• A loving husband, that is willing and able to work


• To live in a free Country


• To be sealed for all time and eternity to my sweetheart and children


• Family that loves me no matter how crazy/emotional I get


• Car that drives me to work (even though it needs to be fixed, it continues to hold out until we can afford to fix it)


• A understanding Heavenly Father who knows my weaknesses and loves me anyway


• Having the Gospel in my life


• The Holy Ghost guiding me to a place and time where I could be taught what I needed

There are many, many things I could add to this list, but the important thing is that we take the time to sit back and remember these things. I testify that the Lord knows our position, and He understands what we are going through. I will be the first to admit that faith is an easy principle when things are going well and our faith isn't being tested. It is however a completely different thing when you feel you have had all you can take. I am ashamed that I allowed my faith to shrink to fear/and doubt. However, I have never learned so much about Faith, and what it truly means to do all we can, and TRUST that the Lord will pick up our slack. I know that my Heavenly Father knows me individually, He helped to guide me to a man that is strong when I am weak, helps me to smile when I want to cry, and is my best friend as we walk through trials hand in hand. I love him so much and I am very Happy to tell you that Brian got a job offer and will be getting health insurance in a couple of months. Sometimes it is hard to remember that the Lord doesn't do things on OUR timetable, and we need to faithfully endure to the end, even when we don't know when that is. I will leave you with the 4th verse of Count Your Blessings

So, amid the conflict whether great or small,
Do not be disheartened, God is over all;
Count your many blessings, angels will attend,
Help and comfort give you to your journey's end.